City, why do you make it so hard to love you?

Just yesterday I was talking to boy midget about how lucky we are to live in a city. There is an ethnic diversity here that we wouldn’t have in a small town, various museums and restaurants, a variety of languages spoken, among other things. I also mentioned that outside the city there would be no subway, streetcar, and maybe not even a bus system. He of course was shocked by this last bit. He has grown up always having a mass transit system and figured everyone else has too.

So after alllllllll of that jerking off about how great city life is, I got smacked in the face this morning. Today I stayed home from work purposely so that the city could install a water meter. There were due to arrive between 8 am and noon. I carefully warned our downstairs tenant a full 24 hours ahead of time that we would need basement access during that time span. I told my manager I would need to work from home for this. I stayed home during those hours instead of running errands or doing anything else useful. I didn’t start up the washing machine because I figured we would be without water for some time.

OF COURSE what ensued was not that simple. Or maybe it was? Because the 2 city employees arrived, carefully examined the water shut off valve, and determined they could not do their work due to one of the incoming pipes possibly being constructed of lead. This process took 10 minutes max. They put in a call to their supervisor and let me know they would have to come back at another time. Oh really?

All of this hassle is to install a Smart Meter ™ for water consumption at my home. This is being done city-wide and I have successfully avoided it for months. However last week I received a letter threatening me with fines up to $100k for non-compliance so I broke down and made the appt. I had avoided doing so because I am an optimist and knew the process would certainly be more complicated than the literature made it seem. Also? Water prices are about to sky rocket here due to these meters. Just like everything else in this city, using water will be very expensive starting very soon.

There are plenty more expenses I can complain about wrt living in a city. I’ll save those rants for another time.




How to get ahead

Forget about it, you can’t.

NOTHING makes me feel more grateful for having a boring-ass job than reading the regular Gawker column of stories from unemployed people. It’s true that having a job gives me a sense of purpose. Everyone needs to do something with their weekdays. Kids go to school, adults go to work. Dogs go to sleep.

For example:

I’m getting tested for allergies in mid-February. I suspect I’m allergic to dogs, same as boy midget. I have eczema that will not go away, on the back of my hands and my lower legs. After I have been petting and cuddling with Pickle or Ellie, my hands feel tingly. I don’t want to think about what will happen if I need to get rid of both dogs. I can definitely live without having dogs in my house but who will take my dogs for me and love them like I do? How will I cope with never knowing what happens to them in their lives? I sort of see now why some owners have their pets put down instead of finding them new homes. Yes I’m sure that sounds morbid to my gentle reader but there it is. This here is my blog and Imma going to express m’self.

My Twitter posts have taken a decidedly hostile, sarcastic turn. I am not going to censor myself there.