Banker’s Hours

Earlier this week I was on a conference call while I worked from home. I would have called in no matter if I had planned on going to the office that day or not, because the meeting was at 8:30 am. For those who are unfamiliar with my weekday schedule, at that time of day it’s completely unreasonable to expect to see me at the office.

For some reason, I cannot get myself to my desk until 9 am no matter what I do. For this I am unapologetic.

This morning I arrived at work at 9 am as usual, and was greeted by mumbled Good Mornings, and Welcome to Another Day in Paradise. I very nearly replied, “Actually, to the people lined up down the street at the homeless shelter, hoping to get some breakfast, this IS paradise.” But that would minimize the very heavy weight that grinds us cube-dwellers down for days, weeks, and years, until all the sparks of creativity and go-get-em are extinguished. So I said nothing. There’s an episode of Cheers (remember that big show?) where a retirement party was being held in the back room. We viewers never see the actual party, but there are sounds to indicate it’s a real humdinger. One of the recurring themes about this subplot is what a sad sack the retiree is. I believe the exact phrase used is, “that’s the sorriest ass I’ve ever seen.” And yeah, after sitting at a desk for 40 years, your ass looks sorry. A friend of mine who is a teacher had to sit at her desk for extended periods of time while she completed report cards. She complained about the numbness felt in her butt. I replied that it takes years of practice to be able to sit at a desk all day; it’s not for amateurs!

Oh right, the conference call story. Husband was in the room while I was on the call and I since had my phone in Speaker mode he heard everything. He found the conversation baffling. Many terms were bandied about: release management, transition managers, service and client managers, check points, gating, artifacts, and more. Phew! It has taken me years to learn all of this information, and the information is useful. I can hold a work-language conversation with ease and I understand the points being made. This all relates back to my love of unambiguous wording. Work-language is unambiguous, and that’s a nice perk, and the beige walls are so calming.


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